It's common for a woman to still have very deep feelings of attachment to and even love for a person who has abused her. This is completely normal and nothing to feel ashamed of. However, these feelings can sometimes cloud a woman's judgment as to what kind of behaviour is appropriate in a relationship and what isn't.
It's okay to have feelings of love for an abusive partner. This does not mean that a woman should keep allowing the person she loves to take advantage of her, treat her badly, trample on her rights or physically or sexually abuse her or her children. A woman has the right to feel safe and secure and be treated with dignity and respect. Sometimes the only way to be safe and to restore one's own sense of self-worth is to leave the abusive relationship.
Leaving is your right and your decision. You may find yourself leaving and then returning to your abusive situation over and over again. This is also common, but remember that you control your own destiny. There are agencies available that can offer you the support that you need, whether it is in the form of information, financial support, housing arrangements or the emotional support that you need to make a healthy decision. These agencies are prepared to stand with you and give you what you need without judging you or your unique situation. You have the right to information and support, no matter what choices you've made in the past or what choices you make in the future.
Reporting Incidents of Abuse to the RCMP
You have the option of the reporting incidents of physical abuse to the RCMP. Physical abuse is a crime, and making an official RCMP report can help protect you and your children, now and in the future, from further abuse.
If you wish to make an RCMP report, there are local agencies that can provide you with information on how to do this. If you prefer to have someone go with you and advocate for you when you make your RCMP report, there are agencies that can help you with this, too.
It is your choice whether or not to report incidents of abuse to the RCMP. Local agencies are here to provide you with support and information without judgment of any kind. It is your choice and yours alone to make an RCMP report. You will receive support regardless of the decision that you make.
However, if the RCMP witness anything that they feel is suspicious enough to file charges against your partner or abuser, they can file charges without your statement. For instance, if they observe that someone has been assaulted, they can file charges of assault without the victim of the assault filing charges.
What Happens after I Make an RCMP Report?
The RCMP will take an official statement from you about what happened. They will probably ask a lot of questions about what happened and when. They may file charges independent of you if they feel there is sufficient evidence of a crime.